“Who’s on the phone?”
“Me.”
“No, I mean, who are you talking to?”
“Me. It’s me from the future.”
“Very funny.”
“I’m serious. Apparently I’m calling to warn myself about something. Hold on, I’m still talking.”
“You know, I don’t find this amusing. I’m trying to talk to y—.”
“Okay, apparently there’s a plane that’s going to crash in a few minutes and it’s going to take the whole front of the house off. So you should probably stay back here in the bedroom with me.”
“You’re a pig.”
“It’s for your own safety. Both of me agree it’s best.”
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